krikketgirl (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
krikketgirl) wrote2010-02-16 07:51 am
krikketgirl) wrote2010-02-16 07:51 am
Gut Reaction
Last week, I made an after-work stop at the store. My least favorite time to be at the store is in the witching hours of 4-6 p.m., when people are tired, harried, feeling their feet pinching their shoes, and in a hurry to go home.
This particular day, I ended up in the self-check line behind an older gentleman who was experiencing frustration. See, at our self-check, you have to tell it that you're paying cash before you put the cash in. It's easy to forget that step, especially if you have recently used one of the self-checks where you can just put in cash instead of specifying a method of payment. Anyway, apparently, this is what he had done just before I stepped into line.
He asked the woman ahead of him, who was busy scanning her groceries, whether she could help him at all. She looked up, and in a withering voice, she said, "Ask her," she stabbed a finger toward the cashier, who was just returning to her post. "I don't work here."
The cashier hurried over, helped the man finish his purchase, and all ended well. Now, I'm sure that the woman who spoke so viciously was really thinking something like this:
"I have to hurry and get home and get supper started. Then there's that big project I'm supposed to start, but I'm sure the kids will need help with homework. I've got to get to bed, earlier, too. Man, these shoes hurt. I can't wait to get out of them. Where is the cashier? Why isn't she where she's supposed to be? I don't think I like that guy in the checkout line. He's loud and kind of annoying. How am I supposed to know what's wrong with the machine? I need to get home and this is taking too long already!"
But what her tone of voice said was:
"You are a jerk. You aren't even worthy of my speaking to you. How dare you treat me like a store employee! Do I LOOK like I work here? Idiot!"
What's your tone? What's my tone? When someone asks for help, it's easy for our gut reaction to be, "Sure! No problem!"--when everything is right in our world. It's when our shoes are pinching and we're in a hurry, though, that it really becomes a test of our heart, I think. What's your gut reaction when someone asks for help and you're tired, stressed, hungry, and wanting a little help yourself?
I know that too often, my gut reaction is that of the woman in the check-out lane: look out for myself, take care of my needs first, and let someone else deal with the other people. But sometimes, there is no "someone else." And I've discovered that I will never be done with "my needs." They will expand to fill my thoughts and time.
It's not witching hour at the grocery store right now...but I'm sure I'll be there again when it is. And it'll be a good time for checking my gut reaction.
This particular day, I ended up in the self-check line behind an older gentleman who was experiencing frustration. See, at our self-check, you have to tell it that you're paying cash before you put the cash in. It's easy to forget that step, especially if you have recently used one of the self-checks where you can just put in cash instead of specifying a method of payment. Anyway, apparently, this is what he had done just before I stepped into line.
He asked the woman ahead of him, who was busy scanning her groceries, whether she could help him at all. She looked up, and in a withering voice, she said, "Ask her," she stabbed a finger toward the cashier, who was just returning to her post. "I don't work here."
The cashier hurried over, helped the man finish his purchase, and all ended well. Now, I'm sure that the woman who spoke so viciously was really thinking something like this:
"I have to hurry and get home and get supper started. Then there's that big project I'm supposed to start, but I'm sure the kids will need help with homework. I've got to get to bed, earlier, too. Man, these shoes hurt. I can't wait to get out of them. Where is the cashier? Why isn't she where she's supposed to be? I don't think I like that guy in the checkout line. He's loud and kind of annoying. How am I supposed to know what's wrong with the machine? I need to get home and this is taking too long already!"
But what her tone of voice said was:
"You are a jerk. You aren't even worthy of my speaking to you. How dare you treat me like a store employee! Do I LOOK like I work here? Idiot!"
What's your tone? What's my tone? When someone asks for help, it's easy for our gut reaction to be, "Sure! No problem!"--when everything is right in our world. It's when our shoes are pinching and we're in a hurry, though, that it really becomes a test of our heart, I think. What's your gut reaction when someone asks for help and you're tired, stressed, hungry, and wanting a little help yourself?
I know that too often, my gut reaction is that of the woman in the check-out lane: look out for myself, take care of my needs first, and let someone else deal with the other people. But sometimes, there is no "someone else." And I've discovered that I will never be done with "my needs." They will expand to fill my thoughts and time.
It's not witching hour at the grocery store right now...but I'm sure I'll be there again when it is. And it'll be a good time for checking my gut reaction.
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Looks like you should write another article. :)
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Thank you for the reminder to pause & compose & consider my tone, even amid the busy <3
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I was grumpy tonight with my better half. I had horrid paperwork to do at work, and I didn't get home until about 9:30 p.m. As soon as I got home, hubby needed a contract faxed, so I had to get back into my car and drive back to work. It wasn't his fault, but he was convenient to be sharp with. I was tired, but that is a poor excuse.
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