Jun. 17th, 2011

krikketgirl: (Default)

Means To An End, originally uploaded by krikketgirl.

The reason I was in a rush to get my driver's license: I needed it to get my new library card!

krikketgirl: (School Mean Kitteh)
Decide that teaching a course online means that you don't have to actually communicate with your students. If they wanted to communicate, they would be on campus, right? Right.

Don't bother looking at the text book. You're getting paid chicken feed, anyway. No one will know if you don't actually read the lessons.

Make it clear that you have put as little effort as possible into preparation. Just repost your lesson plans from several years ago, with the date intact. That will communicate to the students that you have better things to do than waste your time revising lessons.

Make instructions vague. Act surprised and offended when students e-mail you with questions, and respond by telling them to read the directions. When they e-mail again, give them a little more information, but do not disseminate corrections or explanations to the rest of the class. If they want directions made plain, they should work for it.

Grade subjectively. You encourage your students to "be creative" and "think outside the box," so you should take the same approach to grading. If the thrust of the lesson was step-by-step techniques, grade on creativity. If the thrust of the lesson was creative implementation, crack down hard on the technical issues. Keep the students off-balance, mentally.

Don't return grades until the last moment. That way students can't use previous comments to shape their future projects and assignments.

Be sure to grade on every technicality and reinforce that you mean business about grammar and spelling, especially if there are several spelling and grammar errors in your lesson outlines and syllabus. That emphasizes that you are a free agent, ready to dole out harsh criticism while avoiding strict adherence to rules of grammar and etiquette yourself.

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